Being Other & Only - As offices reopen, a reflection on psychological safety.
"Psychological safety is the belief that you can take risks and put forward ideas without facing ridicule or retaliation. More often than not, it’s women — especially women of color — who don’t feel comfortable doing so." - Ruchika Tulshyan
This text message passed through one of my group chats earlier this week, and it was the ‘aha’ moment I needed to identify and crystallise my own feelings. Ever since returning to the office, I was hit, daily, with the feeling of being overwhelmed and incredibly tired. I chalked this up to walking into work instead of taking public transportation, to recognising that I had spent 17 months not having to listen to the inane conversations of people around me, the inevitable - “OMG, your hair!”, to the inevitable “how was your weekend?” small talk*, to increased social interactions after having spent most of 2020 by myself, or to my quarantine 15lbs (really 30) re-introducing a bodily discomfort I had not felt for a decade.
Nope. My anxiety, tiredness and overwhelmedness boiled down to still being Other and Only.
For some reason, my subconscious mind assumed that when the population eventually went back into the office, that I would see more people who looked like me. Surely not the most insane thought to have? The world had just experienced the impact of the murder of George Floyd, we cancelled organisations, created social media profiles that called out the lack of diversity in executive leadership and companies had pledged to do better. Better, for me, meant that recruitment would be intentional and targeted toward ethnic minorities and, in my case, Black Women.
I am an economic migrant and I’m Black – hence the Other. I am also the only senior Black person in my organisation – hence the Only. As a result, I do not feel psychologically safe within my organisation and being Other and Only impacts my ability to bring my whole self to work. There are no cultural allies or unifying reference points of understanding for the professional and social nuances that make me different from my non-minority ethnic colleagues. At work, I exist in the bubble of code-switching and it is exhausting. How can I create or exist in a safe space at work if I am both Other and Only?
But, who is responsible for an employee’s psychological safety at work? Is it the employee? Or is it the employer? There is no immediate action that my employer can take to change the diversity metrics within the organisation. The reality is that any significant changes to diversity in leadership would only result from several persons leaving and my organisation becoming ‘woke’ and intentional in finding different replacement profiles.
As we head back into our respective offices, I offer a few strategies for when this reality hits for you:
1. Talk about it with your friend group - chances are your Black and of Colour friends are having the same experience.
2. No observing from the side lines - get involved with your ERG and find the voices within your organisation - but say no to unpaid emotional labour.
3. What does this job or role mean to you? Where does it fit into your career story? When was the last time you did a career audit? As economic migrants, we are sometimes running the script in our minds that we must outwork the next person. Why commit that energy to a role/organisation that is not part of your future?
4. Read, learn, be intentional about what you take in, and set yourself up for the next goal.
5. Invest in a network - like Pursuit – where you can meet like-minded professional and entrepreneurial Women.
6. If you’re a Senior Professional Black Woman or Woman of Colour who’s interested in mentoring young professionals of colour, please do complete this profile. Pursuit is building a mentorship and sponsorship network.